Rebound: Guatemala Study Abroad Students

Three Students (Anabelle Denton, Abby Subbian, and Amelia Lilley) who participated in the Summer 2024 "New Dukes in Guatemala" JMU Study Abroad program reflect on their recent transition into college at JMU, and how the trip prepared them for college. 

Transcript

Matthew: Hello, Rebound listeners, and welcome to another episode of the rebound podcast. I'm your host, Matthew Hunsberger, coordinator of the rebound program. And today, I'm delighted to be joined by 3 students who traveled with me and 2 other colleagues from the Dean of Students Office to Guatemala this past summer for the first ever new Dukes in Guatemala study abroad trip for incoming JMU Dukes. One of the goals of the program is to provide students with resources before they even arrive as a new student on campus, so that when they experience setbacks and challenges in college, they are already equipped with resources and people that can help them. So let's take a moment to introduce these students to you. 

Anabelle: My name is Annabelle Denton. I am a psychology major with a minor in environmental studies. I'm in the Global Duke's program, the Outdoor Club, the Psychology Service Organization, and Sustain JMU. 

Amelia: My name is Amelia Lilly. I'm an international business and finance major with a Spanish minor and I'm a part of the borderline club, the girl games club and also the global dukes organization 

Abby: My name is Abby Subbian.My major is elementary education and I'm involved in Young Life of Christian Fellowship Group. I'm involved in the garden club and, the JMU Culinary Club. The Culinary Club? Yeah. 

Matthew: So at this point in the semester, what has been your favorite thing so far about being at JMU? 

Amelia: I really enjoy, I guess, like, the spontaneity of every day. Like, you kinda wake up and you have your schedule and your classes and club meetings and stuff, but you really don't know what you're gonna do. But there's so many possible things to do every day, so I really like that. Just like discovering new places to eat or, like, seeing friends or stuff like that. So Yeah. 

Matthew: Would you say that's I mean, that's a pretty different experience than high school. Right? 

Amelia: Yeah. The amount of variety that you have in front of you each day. Yeah. Because we're almost, like, living in a bubble here. Like, there's anything you could ever need, like, within a mile, so it's definitely different than high school life. Yeah. 

Anabelle: Yeah. I really like the independence. I like how many, like, opportunities I have and that I can kind of wake up and make my own day, whether that is, like, studying for 12 hours or going to 8 club meetings or sitting on the lawn listening to music, or sitting in my bed watching TV, like nobody's dictating what I'm doing. And I think that's like it's really fun, but it's also really like challenging, and has made me kind of like find myself a little more because I've been, like, try having to, like, organize my own life and figure out what my priorities are. Yeah. Everything is kinda fun. 

Matthew: I'm glad that you had some self care examples in there. So it wasn't just 12 hours of studying in 8 club meetings, but you had some chilling on the bed watching TV or whatever. So that's great. Yeah. Yeah. Certainly a lot of a lot of options.

Abby:  My favorite thing so far has probably been like the amount of people I've met and the amount of like genuine connections I've met. I was kinda nervous about making other genuine connections on the trip because I felt like the people I'm on the trip were, like, yes, genuine, but I was scared I wasn't gonna have that at JMU. It's because it's a college, but, I've had a lot of opportunities to meet people and learn new things about them and do the things that they do too to, like, try new things. Yeah. I feel like everyone's very nice here. Mhmm. Like, supportive. Yeah. 

Matthew: Yeah. That's I think that's one of my favorite things too is just the the people, the people that I work with, the people that I get to know in my through different things that I do with students is it's great. I think you guys know a little bit about the rebound, program that, you know, the the point is that we, emphasize overcoming setbacks and normalizing setbacks and challenges that students experience. And I know that you've only been here 2 months, and so, I hope that you haven't had a major, major setback that you're trying to bounce back from. But, yeah, maybe at this point, what has been your biggest setback, obstacle, challenge that you've had to negotiate or navigate, since you came to campus? 

Anabelle: I feel like it's been a roller coaster since I got here. I've had a lot of ups and also a lot of downs. I think some of my challenges have been figuring out how to study because in high school, I didn't study at all because that's how I thrived. Because if I studied for a test, I was more anxious for it, and I would freak out when it was put in front of me. So I knew I couldn't do that when I got here. So my first exam, I studied for 30 hours in the span of 3 days for it. I was up pretty much all night, and it was kind of miserable, but I actually really liked the material, so I was like having fun. And then for the 2nd exam in that class, I didn't study at all, and I actually think I might have done better. But I don't really know because I haven't gotten that grade back yet. But I think it's been really interesting to like kind of figure out the difference in like my study habits, especially because I'm taking classes that I actually, like, want to learn about. So it's not, like, a chore to study, and it's hard to, like, switch that in your mind. 

Matthew: That reminds me too of actually something I saw on a a video just this morning, actually. This they were talking about time management, and they said that experience breeds I forget how they worded it, but the ability to know how long something's gonna take. Right? And so, that first exam you spent 30 hours on, second time, you know, not at all. You trust. But maybe, maybe by the 3rd exam, you have a good idea of what what to expect and what what it might take. So, yeah. That is an adjustment in college that, yeah. Figuring out how long things are gonna take and how to manage your time that way. 

Anabelle: Google Calendar has become my best friend. Good. And I will, like, sit down, like, usually at the beginning of the week and lay out all of my, like, assignments and make a plan of how I'm gonna get them done without overwhelming myself. And then I estimate based on the assignments I've already done, like, okay, I know this quiz is gonna take me an hour to do the reading and the quiz, so I'll, like, exactly plan out my study time and, like, put it in my calendar. So that way I, like, leave time for, like, the fun stuff. 

Matthew: Yeah. That's great. Yeah. Yeah. 

Abby: I think a setback has been my accommodations not being, like, applied, I guess. Mhmm. I had an IEP throughout middle school and high school. And when if you graduate with a standard diploma, then and you turn 18, you no longer have an IP. And I didn't know that, but I knew that, like, I wanna have accommodations because I really struggle. But I failed to plan and failing to plan is playing and a fail. So the accommodations office got, like, really busy and they needed more papers than I thought I'd give them or that I'd have. So getting those papers from my elementary school took a while, and just Finding ways to cope with that was really hard because seeing those bad grades and test scores that aren't good Really made how I take on the next day different. Like, I would be kinda a little bit depressed just because I would feel so bad about the test scores. Not necessarily about myself, but about, like, just how I did, I guess. So I got them I'm getting them approved, so that's good. But, it's just been a little hard to stay positive just because, like, we already had fall break and once Thanksgiving comes, then finals are, like, right there. And I'm not good with tests, but I'm using I'm trying to use my strategies. But, a tiny setback recently was, my dog passing away because she was my childhood dog. So having to grieve during the fall break was difficult, but I am thankful that I got to be there with my family, and not put Koko through too much pain, like waiting for me to come down so I could sit by. But yeah. And it was definitely difficult. 

Amelia: I haven't had any (Matthew: Okay. Yeah. That's fine.) Major setbacks. I think it's just getting used to kind of the smaller things, like having a roommate for me. Like, I have been just kind of frustrated with, like, the lack of alone time Mhmm. And also adjusting to the food, just being vegetarian. Like, that was kind of a struggle the first couple weeks, but I feel like I've adapted, like, quickly to things. 

Matthew: So Yeah. So no major no major setback, but still challenges. I mean, there's yeah. Still I mean, anytime you come into a new situation, there are gonna be challenges that you have to navigate. It sounds like you're encountering some of those and finding some ways around them. How about, Annabelle or Abby? Anything you wanna say about how you are overcoming the setbacks you talked about? 

Abby: I think just, like, listening to my self, like, because I have I have ADHD and I have other situations that make it really difficult for me to focus sometimes, and, like, if I wake up and I'm not in, like, that, like, productive mood or if I don't get into that productive mood, like, it's nearly impossible to force that on myself. So even though I'm, like, scheduling my life and everything, like, I get really overwhelmed or I just, like, feel paralyzed and, like, can't do my work as much as I want to. So I feel like that's been really difficult, but I think that just, like, being in touch with myself and, like, giving myself the space to, like, you don't have to do this right now and plan ahead enough. So if you do get in that mindset where, like, you can't do this assignment today, you know you have time tomorrow, and then you're not gonna get behind. Yeah. Yeah. I've been trying to do that. Yeah. Having ADHD definitely has its, cons. Mhmm. Definitely with what you said, like, trying to, like you can't, like, force yourself to get into that. Yep. I think for the accommodations, I guess just going back and going back and and telling them, like, hey. Like, I really need this and also talking to my parents and letting them know, like, hey. My grades look bad because I don't have my accommodations. Mhmm. I will there's, like, this I think it's a notary or some kind of thing that I signed where if emergencies or something, if my parents see my grades that I signed it so they can get it without my permission. Mhmm. So I let them know just in case they check that for some reason and don't freak out. But their motto for me has always been try your best, because they know school doesn't come easy, and I try my best. Just keep having to keep going because there's been times where I've wanted to just drop out and just be like, I don't think this is for me. I feel like I could do so much more with my life. But then I'm just I'm like, I just need to keep going. I just need to get that diploma because I really wanna be a teacher one day. Like, that's my big passion. So I just keep reminding myself, like, that I love kids and that, like, at the end of the day, once I'm a junior, I'll be student teaching every day. So I'll be done with the gen eds in most classes, and I'll be on my path to, like, successfully graduate. I just need to, like, keep going. Yeah. But it's not easy. 

Matthew: Yeah. I hear the word that's coming to my mind is persistence. The whether it comes to, you know, being persistent at making sure you're securing your your accommodations or persisting when things are are difficult, it sounds like that's something that you've been experiencing. Yeah. So in those in those moments when you've been experiencing setbacks, what is something that you wish someone would have said or have done during any of those moments? 

Anabelle: Checking on me. Mhmm. I feel very, like, disconnected and kind of, like, alone because, like, I have some friends here, but I don't have, like, any really, like, close connections. Like, I don't have anyone who's, like, my bestie yet, and I don't really have a friend group. And, like, my sister's here, but she's off in her own world, and my parents are at home. And so I just like kind of feel really alone a lot of the time. And when I'm like struggling, like, I I'm not the kind of person who's gonna like reach out to someone and be like, I need help or I need like someone to like keep me on track or someone to support me, like, I'm not gonna do that. Like, I'm gonna, like, wait for someone to notice, and like and once they do, like, then I'll, like, maybe open up, but so I think that's been, like, a big adjustment and just kinda, like, having to, like, figure out how to, like, do it on my own and not, like, wait for somebody to come in and, like, keep me, like, insane. Yeah. I mean, you you said, you know, people that that you wish, you know, would just kinda check-in. 

Matthew: Yeah. Check-in and see how you're doing. Well, that requires you having connections with people. Exactly. That doesn't always happen as quickly as we might hope for or wish for. So, what has that transition been like socially in terms of what you thought it would be like, and what it has actually been like? Kinda getting getting to finding your place socially at at JMU. 

Anabelle: I tried not to come in with many expectations, just because I kind of came in hope like, not hope, like expecting the worst, because I had a very bad social life in high school, and it kind of broke me. And so coming into college, obviously, I, like, wanted to make a lot of friends, but I didn't really, like I I knew that I wanted to, like, put myself out there because I knew I, like, couldn't just wait around for it to happen. So, like, the first couple of weeks, like, I joined all these clubs, I hosted game nights, I got like, I was talking to anyone and everyone, and I was being super, super social. And it was great, and I had a lot of people to go to, but none of them were close. Like, it was a lot of, what's your name? What's your major? Like, blah blah blah, and nobody actually knows anything about anyone, and nobody remembers each other's names even. Mhmm. And it was just very repetitive like that for weeks, and at that point, I had probably 30 people who were like I had seen multiple times, but like weren't really my close friends. And I kinda like got burnt out, and then I spent multiple weeks basically not socializing because I was, like, so overwhelmed with the situation. So I think it's just been an adjustment of, like, you're gonna meet a lot of people and there's a lot of great people here, but actually forming those connections and finding your group is a lot harder than you might think. Because even if you're in a bunch of clubs, the upperclassmen already know each other, the freshmen are trying to find their place, or they're already friends with their roommates, or they're already friends with people from another club, and it's just it takes a lot more effort than you might think. Mhmm. And you gotta, like, find that balance of, like, putting yourself out there, but giving yourself the time and space to, like, regroup. Yeah. Yeah. 

Amelia: Yeah. I definitely relate to that. I think yeah. Like you said, said, like, it was a lot of what's your name, what's your major, what grade are you in? And while that was happening, like, for me, it was like everybody else had already found their groups. Mhmm. But I don't know. I try to have, like, an optimistic mindset and just like, good things take time. So it's, like, to form deep connections, it's gonna take longer. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 

Matthew: Yeah. I think that's I mean, I think that experience is very, very common. It's that that it it often takes students longer to develop those deeper connections and then we're kind of led to believe it's gonna take. Right? 

Abby: Yeah. Yeah. I definitely expected to have a friend group right now, but, I don't. That's okay. Mhmm. I definitely expected to have music friends, but I don't because I dig and talk, which is hard. But it's okay. But I am really close with Kayla. Like, we're like this and we're gonna roommate be roommates next year. And I'm friends with her, roommate and, like, I made connections, but I like, as much as I wanna have, like, a big friend group, I feel like having, like, 2 people, 2 close friends, like, just like I did at home, like, that's are gonna be there for me when I need them the most Yeah. Instead of, like, a my mom always says, like, quality over quantity. Like, I really have to remind myself because then I'll just, like, be sad and, like, get down on myself when I don't need to. So Mhmm. Mhmm. Yeah. 

Matthew: Yeah. I don't know if you all remember, Kevin, who we watched, his video when we were in Guatemala. He talked about he talked about how just important it is to have those, you know, 1, 2 really close friends. And he, you know, that was his his advice going out as a senior. So, yeah, I think maybe that'll stick a little bit more and you remember that, like, actually, I don't need to have a whole big friend group, but I need you but you do need those those couple people that will be able to notice when things are off. Right? And you can check-in on you and and just check-in even when things aren't off just to see how you're doing and see.

 Anabelle: Yeah. I've been, like, even in high school, I I was that person who had, like, one really close friend and didn't have a big friend group, and I liked it better that way, And I don't want a big friend group now, but I think it's just it's almost like I had at the beginning, it felt like I had a big friend group, but nobody actually cared or knew anything about each other. So that's what, like, kind of set me back was, like, these aren't my people if this is the, like, relationships they're making. Like, I just, like, felt really out of place. 

Matthew: Sounds like you came in without expectations, but then some early experiences gave you Gave me. Gave you some expectations that then you had to kinda dismantle a little bit. 

Anabelle: Pretty much. Yeah. Yeah. Good. It's a lot of ups and downs. Yeah. 

Matthew: Coming back to, is there anything that you wish someone would have said or done during the moments you were experiencing, challenges or setbacks? I didn't get a chance to hear from you, Abby, earlier. I don't know if you had anything to say about that or not. 

Abby: More of “you can do this” and, like, “you got this” and less “oh, you'll be fine”. Mhmm. You'll you'll be fine. Like, I know, but I don't wanna hear that right now because I just need to, like I don't know. I just feel like that's so dismissive. I feel like that's like a, oh, good job. Like and, I mean, I'm thankful for the people that, like, helped me get through that. And I let them know that actually, like, hey. Could we maybe, like, find a different word or, like I tried to communicate that to them, and they were like, oh, yeah. Also, I want you to do that to me too. Like Mhmm. I was like, oh. Like, it made me realize, oh, wow. This, like I just was a big realization, and I really never thought about it. But I definitely think that checking in on someone, just in general, even if it's, like, someone that you're not close to anymore is super duper important. And I'm glad you shared that because now I will keep that in mind. Yeah. So, basically, when you were able to kind of tell people what you needed, it helped you to realize that, oh, that's something that you can do for people too. 

Matthew: Yeah. And what you said was a really, really subtle difference, but I think it's really important. You said you need some somebody to say you you can do this rather than you'll be fine. Right? Yeah. You'll be fine. It's more dismissive. It's more it doesn't acknowledge that it might be hard when but when you say you can do this, it's empowering. Right? Yeah. Yeah. That's I appreciate that really subtle subtle difference in language. Yeah. Yeah. Cool. What's the best advice that you've that each of you has been given up to this point either while you're here or even prior to coming to college that that has influenced, the way you think about things here in college? 

Anabelle: Say yes. Say yes. My parents told me before I got here, say yes. If it's not something that's, like, genuinely, like, makes you uncomfortable, it's like an obvious, like, consensual thing, like, say yes to everything. Like, your friends wanna go to Chick Fil A at midnight, say yes. Just go. Just do it. If people are like so some, like, things that have happened to me, like, do you wanna go on the roof of your dorm? Yeah. I'm getting out of bed right now. Let's go. Like, random things like that, like, just just do it. Like, it's where you're gonna make the most memories. It's where you're gonna, like, make the best friends. Like, it might seem, like, really, like, weird or spontaneous at the time, but, like, just do the fun stuff. Like, just don't sit in your dorm and do nothing. Just, like, take the risks. Yeah. It's more fun like that. 

Amelia: Yeah. I got something kind of similar, like, someone, a JMU alumni, actually told me, like, don't take anything too seriously. Like, I think she kind of had regrets of like immersing herself in school work or just like being almost too dedicated in a way, like, well it's important to that's why we're here, to learn and to go to our classes and like, graduate, but it's just never, like, lose out on the fun aspect. 

Anabelle: Like, if somebody wants to, like, go do some, like, wacky club, then you're like, not really my thing. Like, just go with them. You never know what you're gonna figure out. Like yeah. You're only gonna really regret, like, not doing something and missing the opportunity rather than, like, going and not really liking it or loving it. Yeah. 

Abby: Yeah. My child development teacher always told us when we're doing, like, lesson plans, failing to plan is planning to fail. And it's good to fail. Like, you need to fail. I've always struggled with that, but the trip really made me realize, like, oh, like, I need to fail. It's okay. But, definitely, like, with these tests, like, knowing that, like, if I don't study, I'm not gonna do well and just having to balance and really do things for me when although it's good to say yes, like, I also need to not do all of that and then be like, I have, like, no time to study and then bump my test. 

Anabelle: Yeah. There's definitely a balance. Yeah. 

Abby: Yeah. I think it's been time management and, like, what Tim Miller said about how long we are like, how much time we have in our hands. Like, I already struggled with the time management before. So being here and having so much free time is really easy to take advantage of, I guess, and just, like, watch that movie for too long. Yeah. 

Matthew: Yeah. I was, you know, I watched another thing that I saw just today was they said time management is a misnomer. You can't manage time. Right? You can't change the fact that there are 60 minutes in an hour or things. So really, time management is behavior management. And so what am I doing with my time? How am I using my time? And I think it's good to remind ourselves that, like, we we have control over how we're spending our time. You know? I mean, there's certainly there are things that dictate certain things that we need to be doing or whatever. But, yeah, sometimes we need to examine our behavior like you said. You know? Do I watch that movie for 2 hours or is there something else I need to be doing? I also like, Abby, the the quote you said about failing to plan is planned to fail. And then you said, but we learned on the trip that, you know, failure is is one way that we grow, and that's an important thing. However, it's something we not we don't wanna plan for. Right? We don't wanna plan to fail. But when we do fail, there are lessons that we can learn and things that we can, that we can take from it. So yeah. So finally, jumping into a little bit about the trip, how did the study abroad trip to Guatemala help prepare you for college? 

Amelia: I think it helped prepare me extremely well in several different ways. Mhmm. I think, like, what better time and place to leave your parents for the first time than taking a flight to Guatemala to meet a group of strangers. It was just, like, great in that aspect. I think, yeah, it really helped prepare me just for being alone and for adapting to a whole new world, I guess, and being surrounded by people you don't know and people who you're gonna, like, form relationships with. So it helped me in that way and just, like, all the stuff we learned. Like, we learned so much on that trip, like, through our lessons and classes, just literally how to best prepare for the transition to college. So Mhmm. That helped me. 

Matthew: Yeah. We're I it's it's funny that you mentioned, you know, flying to a different country by yourself. You know, a lot of you in your final papers wrote about that. But, you know, like, thinking that you're ready and then all of a sudden you're, like, by yourself. And, or in Annabelle's case, trying to catch another flight and driving to a different city and things like that. But, yeah, that is one way to kinda shock yourself into some of the some of the stuff you need to do to get ready for being away. Yeah. What else? 

Anabelle: I definitely think it helped a lot. One of the things that stood out to me was, like, I used to have the mindset, like, when you leave high school, like, when you change your place, it's gonna change you. Like, I had a really hard time in high school, and I was always like, if you just go off and travel the world, or if you go to college and find that place, like, you're gonna be fine. Like, everything's like, your problems are gonna fix themselves when you leave. And I think that that was a real reality check Mhmm. When I went to Guatemala because I was, like, struggling with my breathing stuff. It was new people. It was, like, really, like, it was really fun, but there was a lot of, like, kind of reflection that happened on that trip. And it was like a weird, like, you throw 12 people in a room together who have never met and all have very different personalities. And like, we all became close friends, but it was just it was it was really different than I expected in the way of, like, just because you're going off and doing this amazing thing and you're in an amazing place, like, that doesn't mean that everything's gonna be great and fine. Like, you have to, like, realize that, like, you gotta fix your mind before like, everything's not gonna fix itself, kind of. And so coming into college, I was like, okay, like, there's things you can do to make this, like, a good experience, but if you let yourself fall into a rabbit hole, like, you're gonna fall deeper. Like, you're not gonna be able to climb back out. Like, you have to, like, be proactive and, like, know how to take care of yourself, because the new environment is not gonna do like, not gonna fix the problems. Right. And I think I also just, like, learned a lot of, like, lessons on the trip or just, like, repeated things and did a lot of, like, reflection that just kind of, like, made me feel a lot more comfortable coming into school, and I was that day where I got dropped off, I was much less nervous than I thought it was gonna be. Mhmm. Didn't shed a tear. Mhmm. Like, it was it was like a no big deal to me because I had not only done Guatemala, but gone abroad multiple times in high school. Mhmm. And just those, like, little snapshots of, like, being away from your family, like, you know you're gonna be okay. 

Matthew: Yeah. Like, the the the first lesson you talked about, you know, just being in a new situation doesn't mean all your problems are gonna be fixed. It is a great opportunity to make a fresh start. Right? You don't come with some of the baggage that you might have had with, a previous experience. However, you're still bringing yourself. Right? And you're still bringing you're you're bringing your strengths, you're bringing your weaknesses, and and you bring all of that with you. And and and you bring memories of the way things have gone in the past. And so, yeah, it's it's not a it is a fresh start, but, yeah, you're, it's not a complete, Yeah. 

Anabelle: You're always gonna have your history, like, regardless of what environment you put yourself in. That's right. And, like, I thought about I seriously consider taking a gap year instead of coming to JMU this year, because I was just like I was honestly so scared because I was like, I can't do a repeat of high school. And I was like, if I just go travel the world, it'll be great because I'll be, like, seeing all these new places and meeting new people and, like, be out of that, like, normal society. Mhmm. But now I'm now that I've had, like, all these experiences, I'm like, yeah, I think I was wrong. Like, that's not gonna be a pretty sight if I just, like, go off for 6 months. Like, I'm gonna get homesick. I'm gonna get have a lot of, like, struggles and, like, while that's great, like, you're still taking yourself with you. Yeah. A fresh start only does so much. Mhmm. 

Abby: Yeah. I definitely think the trip helped me be independent, and use my strategies for like example, I was really nervous traveling by myself and missing my flight because I'm dyslexic and honestly, it's really easy to miss buses. And it this trip definitely helped me be independent, especially I mean, going to the airport. The airport is a freaky place for me. Like, I was, like, really stressing out. I was like, okay. Airport? Airport? Is airport comfortable? Like, I know it's just so big and it's just like really loud, and I definitely caught myself getting overstimulated, but I definitely found, like, strategies you guys gave us in outlets that if I get overstimulated at college, it'll have like I can use them. I definitely feel like if I did go on the trip, I would be very like more anxious to come to JMU. But I had people like I had people to like eat dinner with on the first night like You did. That was really helpful. I feel like if I didn't have that, I'd just order food and just shut myself out. I feel like this trip definitely helped me find out who I am and my strengths and my weaknesses and things that I need to work on from, like, other people telling me to. I feel like, on the, the scavenger hunt, I feel like when we got Oh, we were we were so mad at each other. I feel like I've never had a relationship where I had an argument like that but stayed friends with. Like, I 

Anabelle: We were so mad. 

Matthew: The 2 of you? 

Amelia: I missed this. 

Abby: We, like, screamed at each other during those gatherings. But it wasn't me getting upset at her like she was fine like I was just overstimulated and just frustrated and I my tone was like she was like why are you yelling at me? I'm like I'm yelling at you I'm so sorry. Like, I was I definitely like also having to just not have a map and you're like, oh yeah, let's meet over here or I think it was someone, but they were like, yeah, let's go have dinner over here. Okay. See you in like 10 minutes and like just having a look at maps and like go on taxis and like talking to people in Spanish and all I know is It definitely was just so different and bringing that to college it definitely I could see similarities. I mean, definitely also helped me not feel drained talking to people. Mhmm. I feel like I had the energy, that I needed to come to college and, I mean knowing the Dean of Students I mean walking Ritter’s dogs, that was really nice of Kayla. And just also, like, finding out that well, like, where I'm actually from. That was so sick. And having that, like, feelings, like, having that session, like, if I didn't share my feelings about how I felt, I feel like I would have just, like, crumbled at the end and just cried if I stubbed my toe and then it would just all come out. So definitely talking about that and meeting people that, like, care and are also going through the same thing. I mean, a lot of people when I tell them I study abroad before even coming here, they'll be like, what? I didn't even know that. I was like, damn. Yeah. Yeah. And so so I really hope that this continues because it was super duper helpful. I am so thankful for this experience and I know that, like, I'll keep in contact with you guys and especially everyone. I mean, the group chat, we still check on each other. I mean, like, I'm always, like, looking for MD and Colin in the marching band. Like yeah. It was just a really great experience. And looking back on those pictures, I was just like Yeah. I remember that meal, like, kinda, it was just, like, really nice. 

Matthew: I I do wanna come back to one thing that you said, Abby, because, it doesn't relate to any of the questions I've been asking you. But you mentioned finding out where you're from, and I think it's important for our listeners to to hear a little bit about that. Do you feel comfortable telling Yeah. At least a short version of that story? 

Abby: Sure. Sure. Okay. So I was adopted at 16 weeks, and I was told that I was adopted from my Guatemala City or just adopted from there. And I was told from my parents, my my adopted parents, my mom's name, that my like, a picture of my mom, but nothing about my dad. And so going into this trip I was nervous because I always like shut out thinking about adoption and just like why was I giving up? Like all these what ifs because when I thought about that, it just made me really sad. So we were in San Pedro Pedro? 

Matthew: We were in San Juan. 

Abby: Yeah. San Juan. Yeah. And I texted my parents and I wanted to know, like, a few days before, I just wanted to know, like, is it possible you could talk to my case manager and see, like, where exactly I'm from? And they told me I'm just from San Juan right when we our last day there and it was really emotional and honestly, like, really scary because I was like, oh, what do I do with this information? But having that, like, chart of all those feelings and have I I keep that book in my bag like I bring that to school with me like because also if someone else needs help too I feel like it's really easy to just give them this information. But yeah I found out where I was on the last day at San Juan, and everyone on the trip was super duper supportive and also just as shocked as me. And I feel like when I told, it was like, oh, like, yeah. It was crazy. But just being back in my country and getting to know people, especially Sophie, like, I feel like I miss her so much, but she was such, like, just a light and like a true Guatemalan. I feel like very family orientated and just I really felt like the meaning of like family doesn't have to be blood. Like, I definitely feel like sometimes fam because you don't get to choose your family and I've always struggled with that because I have family problems at home sometimes but I come back to those memories and I realize, God, it doesn't have to be blood. But my parents did tell me that they do know where my mom was and, like, I could go and knock on her door. 

Matthew: Oh, my gosh. 

Abby: I didn't want to because I just feel like that'd be too much. Mhmm. Because I'm already with a family. I feel like if she wanted to contact me, she would. So I kinda want to just respect her space too. Mhmm. But that was just yeah. But I also do you think it's possible that we can all go back together sooner? 

My gosh. I think they often talk. We have talked about that. I've got a lot of other reunions. I really wanna do that. 

Matthew: See if everybody stays on the same 4 year track and everything. 

Yeah. We'll keep them on the same track. There you go. I'm not hyper. That's right. 

Amelia: I will absolutely hike again. Yeah. 

Anabelle: Yeah. I think the connections have just been, like, very helpful. And even though, like, the the group we're all still friends. We still text in the group chat, but it's a lot harder for some people to respond and actually hang out with people. So Yeah. We're all scattered. Yeah. We're all very scattered. Everyone has very different schedules. Yeah. Which is kind of frustrating because, like, I I wanna have, like, just, like, more time to, like, spend with them, because I have so many great memories. But it's it's just yeah. I think that especially those first few weeks, just having a group of friends already Yeah. And being able to, like, like, go in like, we were all going into the trip, like, in the same boat. We're all, like, gonna struggle a little bit, and we could kind of, like, do that together. The dean of students' office is super helpful. I mean, Holly drove me to my doctor's appointment. That was really nice of her. And I can just, like, go rant to her whenever I need to, and it's just very helpful. 

Matthew: Yeah. So I'm I'm curious just a little bit if any of you have anything to say about this. You it was obvious to me that the relationships that you formed on the trip were really important to you and that they were that they were really helpful when you came to JMU. Also, as you've mentioned, you're all, like, spread across campus. You have different schedules. I know we talked about social things a little bit already, but, how how has that transition been to, you know, from coming in, you know, some people already. It was really helpful. And then, like, settling into your own routines and schedules and getting to know new people. 

Amelia: I think I have something to say about this like obviously we all got here in kind of went our separate ways I guess like living our own lives. We're not all in Guatemala, staying in eco domes together, but I know for me, like, literally right before this podcast, I was at D-Hall and I ran into Josh, and it's just like, it totally brightens up my day whenever I see any of you guys anywhere on campus, like, no matter what we're doing, like, it's just so nice to have that. Like, you just think of the good memories, it's nice to see the person, and while it is kind of rare to see someone, it's just it's really nice even though we all have made other friends and stuff. 

Matthew: Yeah. You still have that shared experience and that that's something beautiful that you have that Yeah. Yeah. And while while the relationships might change and you you have other friends, you the the importance of that and significance of that experience is is something that you carry with you. Yeah. 

Anabelle: Yeah. I think it was such an advantage coming to college with that. That's great. Yeah. And nobody else would, like, we're the only people who have that experience. We're the only people with those stories and those memories and, like, I think it's just really fun, like, what Amilia was saying, like, just, like, walking around campus and, like, I'll run into somebody and, like, no matter where I'm going or what I'm doing, like, we're gonna stop, we're gonna say hi, we're gonna chat for a second, like, even if it's only 30 seconds, like, we're not just gonna pass each other by. We'll, like, take pictures of each other and send it in a group chat from, like, across the street, and, like, it's really fun to just, like even though I don't feel like I have a close group of friends yet, like, I I know I have these people, like, I can rely on, and I know that, like, whenever I see them, it's gonna, like, brighten my day. And even though we're all very different people, like, we're all super close, and, like, we probably would never have known each other if it weren't for that trip. I think about that. That's, like, really special. Annabelle, you live next to me. Like, I see Colin Raquel in the dining hall, and it's, like, if we didn't go to another country together for 10 days over the summer, like, I would just Yeah. Totally ignore you. Yeah. Like, we would have no idea. Yeah. It's just crazy to then go out. 

Matthew: It makes you think about the gift of that of that of each relationship, of each person that you've gotten to know. 

Anabelle: Yeah. It's also, like, when I went a couple years ago with my high school on a trip, they sat us down one night, and they were, like it was, like, probably halfway through this, like, 2 week trip, and they were, like, I'm noticing the honeymoon stage is over, and I I was, like, yeah. Because I I thought that was really interesting that, like, you meet all these people, you become great friends, it's so fun, and you're all getting along, and then, like, reality hits at some point, and there's gonna be some turbulence, but you're like still gonna stay friends, and it's the same way Like you and Abby on the scavenger hunt. Yeah. It's the same way, like, in college, like, I was warned, like, there's gonna be that honeymoon phase the 1st few weeks. It's gonna feel like summer camp, and once reality hits, like, you're gonna crash a little bit, but, like, just push through. You'll be fine. And I think that I had the same experience with, like, this group of people, and, like, I feel like I had it twice, like, in Guatemala. I feel like it happened, and then back on campus, like, we were there for each other the 1st week, we were hanging out a lot. I saw at least one of them every day and had meals together whatever, and then like as, like, we all started doing clubs and classes started and everything kind of scattered, And I feel like there was like a period where it was kind of just like, we we didn't really see each other a lot. We like didn't we weren't putting a lot of effort into like the group just because we had so much else going on. Yeah. That's true. We started taking pictures of each other. Yeah. Now I feel like it's a good balance for like, we're gonna run into each other. We're gonna say hi. We're gonna, you know, hang out every couple weeks and like whatever, and I think that's it's just kinda nice to, like, have those connections even though it's not gonna be, like, the the same as, like, the Twister nights in the Eco Lodge. Like, that's not gonna be every night, but I still have these people, and they're still, like, in the vicinity of me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 

Abby: Yeah. Like, bumping into you guys, like, it's I would gasp sometimes and people would be like, are you good? Like, you have you can't do that. I'm like, sorry. You know, I'm not disappointed in my trip. But yeah. Like, having you guys and also Ritter, Matthew, and, Holly, and even Sophie and, like, the drivers. Like, just knowing those connections and Urs. Well oh, yes. Yes. Oh, of course. He's so funny. Like, I just and also seeing the connections that you guys have with, like, bosses, like, with, like, like, how Holly made you guys the notes and, like, the pictures. Like, that just, like, encourages me to, like, text, like, the group board just, like, think about the trip which makes me really happy. And, yeah, I think that it helped not find bad connections in a way. Mhmm. You know? And what I want in a connection, what I want in Friends, it's definitely helped. That's awesome. 

Matthew: What were the biggest lessons you took from the trip that helped you navigate the beginning of your college experience at JMU? 

Amelia: I think for me, just something that really motivated me and made me feel more confident was like if I can go to Guatemala like not knowing anyone I'm gonna be meeting there or not knowing like that I'm gonna be hiking a volcano or like I don't know even as simple as like eating the food I'm eating like I can do anything in Harrisonburg at JMU. It's like it really helped prepare me in that way. 

Matthew: So In terms of, like, confidence in your ability to yeah. 

Amelia: Mhmm. Yeah. 

Anabelle: I think for me it would be, like, you are who you wanna be. Like, going into Guatemala, like, I knew I wanted to, like, be friends with these people, and I put myself out there, and I wanted to, like, I I wanted to, like, open that up to be, like, a good connection. And I was very much introverted in my last few years of high school, and I think as a, like, little kid, I was much more, like, outgoing, and I lost that for a few years. And in, like, Guatemala and, like, this group of people, like, Lily the other day, I think, said that I was an extrovert, and I was like, I was like, what? In what world am I an extrovert? Like, I am so, like, I never thought of myself as like the outgoing, like, confident person, and I think, like, I, like, had that realization in Guatemala, like, you don't have to just like be this person that, like, hides in their room and, like, doesn't talk to anyone or, like, you're not gonna be disliked by everyone you meet. Like, if you really just if you wanna be confident, if you wanna put yourself out there, just do it and, like, you never know what's gonna happen. And so I think that, like, a lot I think I got a lot of confidence from the trip. Definitely. Thank you. Yeah. Great. 

Abby: Probably the it's okay not to know everything or not to know anything at all. Mhmm. I feel like I went with the flow way more, and didn't overthink things at all. I feel like so many things are different in Guatemala than here. Definitely a reality check just because Guatemala was so chill and we didn't have like work work. But yeah that's probably the biggest thing and also just not to be so hard on myself too. Definitely feel like I learned that well in Guatemala and I feel like it helped me in college. Yeah. 

Anabelle: And it did help me a lot, like, being able to live in the moment and, like, don't you don't need to be worrying about what's happening 20 years from now or what happened 2 weeks ago, like, it doesn't matter. Just, like, focus on the now, and I really took that into college, and it's been very helpful. Also, how to use Canvas. I've never seen Canvas in my life, and yeah. I'd never used it. I didn't know how to, like, navigate it, and I think I would have been very lost and confused and probably missed assignments the first few weeks because I had no idea how to use it. 

Matthew: Well, that was very intentional on our part. Yeah. It was to, you know, make sure that we were doing stuff on Canvas, so that you would feel ready when you came. Yeah. Yeah. You know, your your comments about, you know, not being able to affect the the future. Yeah. Reminds me of a quote that I ran across this week that said, worrying will not take away tomorrow's problems, but it will take away today's joy. Yeah. And I thought that was a good reminder to, yeah, to try to let go of some of that stuff that we spend way too much time thinking about and wasting energy on. Yeah. Yeah. Is there anything that we didn't talk about that you wanted to talk about? 

Abby: I feel like if you're listening to this and you're questioning about studying abroad, don't question it. Just do it. 

Matthew: Say yes, right? 

Abby: Say yes. Say yes. Say yes. It will change your life completely. And plus, if it's, like, financial wise, like, there are so many people here at JMU to help you, that will understand. And just everyone at JMU wants to help you. Like, it could be any anyone. But, yeah, just yeah. And you're doing great. 

Matthew: Yeah. I'm so glad that you're aware of all of the the desire that people at JMU have to help students because, it really is true. And a lot of times people don't know about the resources or don't find out about them until, you know, it's too late. And so I think it's that's one of the big things that we wanted you all to take from this is that you're not alone, and you have each other, and you have us, and beyond us, there's all kinds of people at JMU, like you said, Abby, that are that are here to help you. So I'm glad that that's a lesson that you took with you. 

Anabelle: I think I would also say, like, do what scares you most. Mhmm. Like, do the hard stuff. Challenge yourself, especially if you're, like, coming into college. Like, don't take the easy route. Don't do whatever is normal or whatever is expected of you. Like, you are in control of your own life, and, like, taking the reins can be really scary, but really fun. And I just think it's really important to not run away from your fears and, like, know that there's so many people here to support you, and, like, everybody cares about each other, and just do the hard stuff. Just don't run away from the hard stuff. And 

Matthew: Well, thank you all. It has been a real pleasure, going on the trip with you, first of all, getting to know 12 students who just blew my mind with how how accepting you were of each other and how everybody included everybody in everything. I mean, that sounds like an exaggeration, but it's really not. I mean, you you all really did include each other really well, and I think in some ways spoiled us because now in future years, we'll expect that every group's gonna get along as well as you did, and it might not be the case. But, the other thing that I appreciated about your group is how you were so eager to do things and to I mean, from, you know, Amelia wanting to take as many Spanish classes and things as you could to, you know, people getting up early and going you know, hiking up the or taking the van up the mountain to watch the sunrise early way early in the morning, to I mean, we you all pushed yourselves in in unique ways and did amazing things and it was a real joy to travel with each one of you. So, that brings us to the end of this episode of the rebound podcast. So thank you for joining us and we wish you the best as you conquer each new day. Go, Dukes!